“Mommy Wars” Are Dumb

I said it.

I have thought this for years.

I’m going to admit that I have bought into various segments of the issue at various (conveniently synchronistic) times in my life.

But I swear I am older, wiser, less silly.  Mommy wars are dumb.

I am prompted tonight – exhausted after working at my (challenging!) day job all day, combined with a school pizza party that ended with ice cream, followed by a rather difficult “winding down” time at home…  I’m just tired, y’all.

So when I read this blog tonight, I agreed completely:

How about all of us — working, stay at home, whatever – collectively agree that we’re doing our best, that the world goes around because we’re all different, and nobody NOBODY is right.

But what’s absolutely right is this:

kids. just. need. parents.

I ALSO wanted to interject that guys (I’m referring to dads, step-fathers, uncles, friends and other awesome guys that care a LOT about the kids in their lives) also deserve equal credit.

Furthermore, I want to interject the notion that those of us that actually participate in these so-called “mommy wars” may actually just have the privilege of doing so because we are the benefactors of education, and opportunity.

In my own case, my mother deserves most of the credit — she turned me down when I asked if I could “travel in Europe” instead of embarking into my first year of law school.  I ended up thanking her outright when my life circumstances didn’t work out as planned.  I’m happily working (some days harder than  others) as a single mom to 3 kids — and I don’t doubt for a second that my own daughter AND 2 sons are going to ultimately understand that the privilege I actually enjoyed was this:

The choice not to work outside my home for awhile, and the privilege to get back to work when I wanted and needed to do so.

But no matter what, my kids have me, their dad, and a lot of other people around them that truly care about them.  Each of them will grow up to be as complicated as the next person (aren’t we all?), but no matter what, I know each of my children knows that he/she is loved.

Which is more than I think we can say for kids that just don’t have parents.

So how about we quiet those so-called wars, do the best we can, and maybe even do better and open up the world of love and opportunity to some kids whose needs go beyond whether they got formula or breastfeeding for the first 6 months of their lives.

I’ll step off my soapbox here. Isn’t this a startup blog?

Yes.

But we’re building our app ONLY because we believe so passionately in the connection that parents feel to the little people they care about.  We actually think we can do something that matters to a bunch of us (which, in turn, matters to our little people…)

Thanks for being patient with this blog entry….

H

Thanks Frank

Thanks Frank. Seriously. We so enjoyed your op-ed this week.

Our readers can find your article here: http://www.nytimes.com/2012/04/15/opinion/sunday/bruni-working-and-women.html?_r=1&ref=frankbruni

We appreciated it for a variety of reasons — but the biggest one was the fact that you stood up for your mom. As mothers (2 founders, 5 littles, many pets), we just like guys that stand up for their mothers, no matter what. But as MOTHERS, entrepreneurs, lawyers, wives, girlfriends, women and people, we just liked what you had to say today.

Hilary Rosen’s comment about Ann Romney set fire to the always-there-so-called-mommy-wars firestorm. And as you so respectfully commented, none of this noise really matters. We’re all working hard. At home with kids. In the office.

Hello, y’all? Taking care of other people is one of the wonderful gifts in this life, but it’s also hard.

We raise this here because our idea is built on this exact issue. Taking care of people is both wonderful and hard. We believe, so passionately, that technology can make it easier.

And so… the wheels of progress turn on…

Just wanted to put out there that we are nodding in agreement with you Frank. Hugging our little boys in the hope that they might stick up for us in the NY Times someday too. And working really, really hard behind the scenes to get our business up and running so we can play our part in the progress that we all need to do more for all of the people and places that require our time and attention.